Quality Blog

Jim's Gems: Influence and Support Change

April 2, 2012

"What you see is what you get" is a good rule to remember when it comes to personal relationships.

Another good rule to follow is that if you want to form a lasting relationship with someone, start by being basically happy with whom he or she is. It is courting disaster when you allow thoughtless, abusive or angry people into your life assuming that under your influence they will change. Don’t do it! You’ll typically be disappointed and the affect on your life could very well be disastrous.

What is likely to happen is that we will change our behavior to accommodate these people, rather than the other way around. Change is not something we can force on other people. Lasting change comes from within. And, when people are pushed from outside forces, they will push back.

If, in significant ways, the people in our lives are not what we believe they should be, pressuring them to change will not typically be effective. Change will not happen if we are convinced we are always right, or if we believe that the fault lies always with the other person. We have to adjust our approach and maybe change our attitude, without affecting our core values.

Possibly, if we were to allow these people the dignity of being who they are without interjecting our criticism, we might find change happening naturally of its own accord. One thing, however, is certain: when we give up blaming and criticizing others, our relationships with them improve enormously.
You must login or register in order to post a comment.




Karen Spencer, Clinkenbeard's quality manager, discusses what makes the plant stand out, advice for other plants, and looks to the future.
More Podcasts

Quality Magazine


2015 May

The May 2015 edition of Quality Magazine includes articles on cloud technologies, depth gages, ISO 9001, digital inspection and cool new products.

Table Of Contents Subscribe

Topics to Talk About

What topics would you like to see Quality cover more?
View Results Poll Archive

Clear Seas Research

qcast_ClearSeas_logo.gifWith access to over one million professionals and more than 60 industry-specific publications,Clear Seas Research offers relevant insights from those who know your industry best. Let us customize a market research solution that exceeds your marketing goals.


Facebook2015_40 twitter_40px.png  youtube_40px.pnglinkedin_40px.png  GooglePlus_40